Handumanan (Remembrance)

Handumanan
I have been searching for you all along. This restlessness and those vain attempts to satisfy it were but manifestations of my searching. I've searched for you in the mountains, in Mozart's great opus, in many a woman's caress and among the carousing of the Friday Boys at Arlie's place. But you were gone.

Some years back, I found myself running away from you. I was afraid to admit what I then perceived as a weakness. I dared asking you when I was already cornered: Who are by the way? Why am I so grateful that you're alive and well? Why do I kept on praying to God that you may have the best life can offer? Why can't I touch you and defile you? Why do I care so much about you?

I do now have the answer to those questionings. I have one singular answer to all of them. But I reckon it is already late to tell what it is. Much of my life has already been spent in frantic searching only to find that the day is almost done. So for the sake of those good old times spent together, let me offer this poem in remembrance of our one of a kind friendship.


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